Edited to add:
The Atlantic Forums present...
The WORST CHRISTMAS MUSIC EVAR
Score (so far, through @Glitter's contribution):
17 "The Christmas Shoes", NewSong
15 "Wonderful Christmastime", Paul McCartney
7 "Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer", Elmo & Patsy
6 "Do They Know It's Christmas", Band Aid
5 "Dominic the Donkey", Lou Monte
2 "All I Want for Christmas is You", Mariah Carey
2 "Santa Buddy", Michael Buble
2 "Last Christmas", Wham!
1 "I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas", Gayla Peevey
1 "Funky Funky Christmas", New Kids on the Block
1 "Please Daddy, Don't Get Drunk This Christmas", John Denver
1 "Jingle Bells", The Jingle Cats
Original post:
The first two are actually rants about two of the worst Christmas songs out there.
And some mashups that make things a little better.
Bad Christmas Music
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Bad Christmas Music
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Re: Bad Christmas Music
Okay, everybody post the five worst Christmas songs in this thread. Extra Credit if you can name a particular rendition by a particular "artist" who really manages to complete disrupt any festive feeling you may have about this time of year.
Our submissions will be graded on a 5 points for first, 4 points for second, etc., basis and posted on the first post of this thread, which I appropriately hijacked from @WolfofWords, since it has some stinkers right there in it for your consideration. Other audio or video evidence may be presented if you find it necessary to share your pain. The top songs will be posted at the top for shaming and general ridicule.
Our submissions will be graded on a 5 points for first, 4 points for second, etc., basis and posted on the first post of this thread, which I appropriately hijacked from @WolfofWords, since it has some stinkers right there in it for your consideration. Other audio or video evidence may be presented if you find it necessary to share your pain. The top songs will be posted at the top for shaming and general ridicule.
This has been another bit of brain shrapnel from...
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Re: Bad Christmas Music
More "inspiration":
This has been another bit of brain shrapnel from...
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Re: Bad Christmas Music
Okay, I'm going to put in the first entry, here...
5th: "Funky Funky Christmas", New Kids on the Block
For reasons that should be obvious just from the title and artist
4th: "All I Want for Christmas is You", Mariah Carey
Because PLEASE MAKE IT STOP PLEASE AAAAAGH *apply icepick forcefully to cerebral cortex*
3rd: "Wonderful Christmastime", Paul McCartney
Most mailed-in cash grab of any song at all, regardless of subject or time of year.
2nd: "The Christmas Shoes", NewSong
The children's choir kicks in and there is no one in the listening area holding onto their lunch
1st: "Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer", Elmo & Patsy
Endless. Monotonous. Worst of taste. Problematic. This ticks off every box and then goes for ones you didn't even know existed.
5th: "Funky Funky Christmas", New Kids on the Block
For reasons that should be obvious just from the title and artist
4th: "All I Want for Christmas is You", Mariah Carey
Because PLEASE MAKE IT STOP PLEASE AAAAAGH *apply icepick forcefully to cerebral cortex*
3rd: "Wonderful Christmastime", Paul McCartney
Most mailed-in cash grab of any song at all, regardless of subject or time of year.
2nd: "The Christmas Shoes", NewSong
The children's choir kicks in and there is no one in the listening area holding onto their lunch
1st: "Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer", Elmo & Patsy
Endless. Monotonous. Worst of taste. Problematic. This ticks off every box and then goes for ones you didn't even know existed.
This has been another bit of brain shrapnel from...
SCOOTER
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Re: Bad Christmas Music
Fifth - "Please Daddy, Don't Get Drunk This Christmas" by John Denver
Sad. Dark. It brings up too many bad memories.
Fourth - "Santa Baby" as sung by Michael Buble (aka "Santa Buddy")
I love the song a lot when sung by Eartha Kitt, Gwen Stefani, Ariana Grande, etc. but Buble's "no homo" version irks me.
Third - "Do They Know It's Christmas" by BandAid
Ignorant, racist, and not even a good song. They should have just opened their wallets for charity instead.
Second - "Wonderful Christmastime" by Paul McCartney
Paul wrote a lot of great songs but this one was phoned in which makes it hurt even worse knowing he was capable of penning a new Christmas classic.
First - The Christmas Shoes by NewSong
See above Patton Oswalt rant about how ridiculously trite and poorly written the song is.
Sad. Dark. It brings up too many bad memories.
Fourth - "Santa Baby" as sung by Michael Buble (aka "Santa Buddy")
I love the song a lot when sung by Eartha Kitt, Gwen Stefani, Ariana Grande, etc. but Buble's "no homo" version irks me.
Third - "Do They Know It's Christmas" by BandAid
Ignorant, racist, and not even a good song. They should have just opened their wallets for charity instead.
Second - "Wonderful Christmastime" by Paul McCartney
Paul wrote a lot of great songs but this one was phoned in which makes it hurt even worse knowing he was capable of penning a new Christmas classic.
First - The Christmas Shoes by NewSong
See above Patton Oswalt rant about how ridiculously trite and poorly written the song is.
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"Even if the world is a simulation, I'm still going to keep it real." - Graeme Barrett
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Re: Bad Christmas Music
There are only four bad Christmas songs. They are:
1. Dominic the Donkey
2. Wonderful Christmastime
3. Christmas Shoes
4. Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer
But since we have to have five, I'll throw in "Jingle Bells" by the Jingle Cats.
https://youtu.be/VelDf3SwUes
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Re: Bad Christmas Music
Writer. Pirate. Paralegal. Blogger.
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"Even if the world is a simulation, I'm still going to keep it real." - Graeme Barrett
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Re: Bad Christmas Music
I like that one! Not bad Christmas music at all, just...slightly...creepy!
This has been another bit of brain shrapnel from...
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Re: Bad Christmas Music
I think I'm going to have to go with
1 - Christmas Shoes
2. Wonderful Christmas time
3. Do They Know it's Christmas
4. Last Christmas - yes the Wham song
1 - Christmas Shoes
2. Wonderful Christmas time
3. Do They Know it's Christmas
4. Last Christmas - yes the Wham song
sir, that's my emotional support long haired male character
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Re: Bad Christmas Music
I guess in context it gets even creepier for me. The movie is actually interesting in that it shows the entire birth and development of a killer before he snaps.
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